Now Hiring (Gwendolyn, Emily, and Kelsey)

Good morning!  It’s Friday, it’s the end of the week.  But today is my Saturday so I have today and tomorrow off from work.  Hooray!

Today we are ending the Now Hiring series!  It’s so sad!  But next week we will be starting a new series so I am excited to bring that to you.  I’m not going to give away too many hints, but this one will be very different from this story.  So, without further ado, I hope you have enjoyed Now Hiring and I hope you come back for another story next week!

Now Hiring (Gwendolyn, Emily, and Kelsey)

Seasonal work for Portside Doggie Daycare.  Starting at $10 an hour, part and full time positions available.  Must be able to work as a team and work well with other people and pets.  Feel free to come in and inquire about a job. We would love for you to join our team!

Gwendolyn

There are sometimes where the person that you interview fits everything in the criteria but there is one tiny thing that makes you question if you should hire them?  Even if it’s something that seems super minor but you still don’t know if you could hire them? I remember getting an application for someone who I thought would fit perfectly for the front desk position.  She seemed to have a lot of customer service experience which made her a great candidate. So I called her and set up an interview.

She was sitting in the lobby and she looked like a normal person.  But as soon as I walked up to her I could smell a terrible body odor coming off of her.  It was horrendous. But I stepped up and held out my hand. “Hello. I’m Tammy.”

The girl stood up and shook my hand.  “I’m Gwendolyn, but you can call me Gwen.”

I smiled.  “It’s a pleasure to meet you Gwen.  Let’s step in the office and get this started.”  We stepped inside the office and I immediately opened the window to let the fresh air in.  “It’s a beautiful day outside isn’t it?”

Gwen smiled.  “Yes it is. I love the fresh air.  The outdoors is probably my favorite place to be.”

I sat down at the desk.  “So, why don’t you tell me about yourself?”

Gwen shifted in her chair.  “Okay. I am a vegan, I love animals and I don’t want to harm them at all.  And I am trying to live as off the grid as I can. I still have a bank account which is how I can hold down a job, but I live in my van and move from place to place everyday.  Oh…and I use the smell of the land as my perfume everyday. I love nature and I love animals, I just want to be a part of it too. I don’t want to live anywhere permanently, I just want to move around and be free.”

I could feel my eye start to twitch.  I quickly rubbed it before moving on. “Okay.  So you don’t have a permanent residence?”

She shook her head.  “No ma’am. I live in my van.  If I have any mail or anything like that it goes to my parents and they take care of it.  I see them at least once a month so I can collect all my mail from them.”

“I see.  And I see you have worked in customer service before?”  I couldn’t tell if the smell was getting stronger or if I was becoming weaker, but something bad was happening and I wasn’t a fan.

“Yes ma’am.  I used to work in a couple stores and I worked in a hotel.  Everyone said I was great with the customers and the customers loved me.  So I definitely have worked in customer service and I loved it.”

I nodded.  “That’s fantastic.  We could definitely use someone with a lot of customer service experience.  So, what is your availability like?”

“Well I don’t have another job but I would like to have mornings off so I can still attend morning yoga and meditation with all of my friends.  Would that be possible?”

I shrugged.  “I don’t see why not.  What time does that happen?”

“We start at 10 and it ends at 3 Monday through Friday.  So I work anytime after 4 because that will give me time to freshen up before coming.”

I knew then and there that I couldn’t offer her a front desk position but she could work in the afternoon.  “So, I wouldn’t be able to give you a front desk position because we close at 6 so I couldn’t have for only work for a couple hours.  But I could have you work in the back because we have people here until 9 or 9:30. Would you be interested in that?”

She shrugged.  “I guess. I would rather work in with the customers but if that’s not possible I understand.  So, yes. I will take a position in the back.”

I shook her hand and showed her out.  I somehow dodged a bullet with having her work in the front.  But I had a feeling that she would do really well, which she did.

Emily

I remember sitting in the office and trying very very hard to not slap this interviewee across the face.  On the application, there is a mark for if the applicant has ever been to jail or had a criminal record. Emily had checked yes but in the comment section she put, ask.  Ask? I wasn’t too sure but I thought I would bring her in for an interview anyway.

So when I asked her about it, she started with a sigh.  “Well…it wasn’t my fault. I was driving my car when suddenly a car drove into me.  I swerved off the road and hit someone else, but I kept driving when I saw they were okay.  I didn’t see any damage on my car so I kept driving. I got home and there was a police officer waiting for me and they arrested me for a hit and run.  I told him what happened but he didn’t believe me. The police never believe me. So I got sent to jail for a hit and run that wasn’t even my fault. I was hit first and because I got hit then I unfortunately ran into someone else.  Apparently the person that hit me never got caught but I had to spend time in jail because I was apparently at fault. I caused a huge accident, according to police, and because I didn’t see it, I am completely at fault. So I got arrested and spend 2 years in jail for a crime that I never did.  So that’s what happened. That’s why I have a criminal record. I went to jail for something I never did.”

I’m just going to let you know now, I did not hire her.

Kelsey

This last one I’m going to tell you about was a doozy.  She was a special case who I could only describe as…odd.  I honestly don’t have another word to describe Kelsey other than odd.

When she came in for her interview, she was dressed very professionally.  I introduced myself and brought her into the office for the interview. “So, tell me about yourself.”

She scoffed.  “Well. I am a registered vet with the state and no vet’s office will hire me so I had to come here.  I have an IQ of 127 and school was not a problem for me. I finished vet school is just over a year and have yet to find a job at a vet’s office.  So I had to take a bit of a leave just to make ends meet.”

I was slightly taken aback.  A registered vet who hadn’t been hired by someone?  Seemed odd. “So why do you think a vet’s office won’t hire you?”

She scoffed again.  “I don’t know. I come in, go into the interview, give my demands, and they don’t hire me.  I don’t understand why.”

I could tell that one of the reasons was because she always scoffed, but I was curious about her demands as well.  “What were your demands, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“Gah…I was demanding to be their head vet because obviously I am smarter than the doctors that they already have.  I also demanded a 6 figure salary starting out, somewhere around $150,000 and going up every quarter. But no one thinks that my demands are fair and they aren’t willing to give me anything.  They want me to start off as their lowest doctor and barely above minimum wage. Like…honestly. The audacity of these places.”

At this point, I was curious if she was going to give demands for starting at this job.  “Okay…so do you have any demands for starting here?”

Kelsey nodded.  “Obviously. I want to start at $20 since I am a registered vet and I can give any dog or cat their vaccinations and I can tell you exactly what’s wrong with them.  And I want my pay to rise every quarter by $1 until I am making 6 figures a year or until a vet’s office hires me. Whichever comes first. And I want to only work mornings.  Maybe 7 am to 4 pm, Monday through Friday. I will not work weekends.”

This was the moment where I figured out that this girl was never going to get hired anywhere unless she lowered her demands.  “Unfortunately I won’t be able to give you any of your demands. Pay starts at $10, which is minimum wage, and we can’t give you the hours you want unless you have another job or a reason for not being able to work certain hours.  We can work around other schedules, but no one has a set schedule except for administration.”

I watched Kelsey start to become furious.  “No! This is not fair! I am overqualified for this job which means that I deserve more than these measly people who have no animal experience.  I am too smart to be working here but I need some sort of income.”

I shrugged.  “Well. You can take the offer and have some sort of income, or you can leave.  It’s your decision.”

Kelsey angrily stood up and marched out the door.  She marched all the way to her car and sped out of the parking lot.  She was definitely odd. There was no other way to say it.

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