Hello! How is everyone doing? It’s Friday and it’s time for another part of our Now Hiring series. I must admit, I feel kinda bad for Tammy for all of these people that she has had to interview. It must be hard to interview so many…interesting people.
Anyway! This story is and Adventure. Enjoy!
Now Hiring
Seasonal work for Portside Doggie Daycare. Starting at $10 an hour, part and full time positions available. Must be able to work as a team and work well with other people and pets. Feel free to come in and inquire about a job. We would love for you to join our team!
Charlotte
Do you ever have a time where you are doing something, anything, and you leave the situation just scratching your head? That was this girl. Her name was Charlotte and I didn’t think anything of it when I got her application and resume.
I remember walking out of my office and seeing a young girl sitting in the lobby. She kept looking around the lobby like something was out to get her. I brushed it off and walked up to her. “Good morning, I’m Tammy.”
She cautiously took my hand and shook it. “I’m Cassandra.”
I cocked my eyebrow and looked at the application. “Uh…it says here that your name is Charlotte. Am I speaking to the right person?”
Charlotte shook her head. “No…well kinda…you see my legal name is Charlotte but I prefer to be called Cassandra. It’s like, Charlotte is a boring person and Cassandra is a fun person.”
I was taken aback. What was happening here? “Uh…okay…why don’t we step into the office and start the interview.” I led Charlotte into the small office and sat her down. I sat down opposite from her and looked at the resume. It wasn’t that full and there wasn’t any past job experience. “So…tell me about yourself.”
Charlotte shrugged. “Who do you want to know about? Charlotte or Cassandra?”
I felt my eyes start to widen. “Uh…the one who will be working here?”
“Probably Cassandra. Charlotte is so boring. She only does the right thing. She only follows rules. Cassandra though…” She paused, almost as if she was trying to find the right word. “Cassandra is fun. She loves to party and have a good time with her friends. She sometimes listens but usually likes to do her own thing.”
I could feel my jaw start to drop but I had to quickly pull it up. Was this girl serious? “Well I think that Charlotte sounds like the perfect person to work here. I know my senior staff would love to have Charlotte on board.” I put on a semi fake smile to make it look like I was serious and playing along with her game.
Charlotte’s face dropped a bit. “I figured you would say that. I guess Charlotte will have to finish the interview then.” She ran her hand through her hair and flipped it to the other side of her head. She blinked quickly and smiled again. “Okay. Charlotte here. Let’s continue.”
I could tell that my face was turning red; I didn’t really know what to think regarding what just happened in front of me. I cleared my throat. “Okay. So…what do you think you could bring to the team?”
We continued the interview and I let her leave. I told her I would let her know if she got the job. But I knew I wouldn’t be hiring her, my senior staff would not appreciate having someone with a split personality. It would be too hard to keep track of who they were talking too.
Geoffrey
Have you ever seen someone and instantly thought they were extremely hot? That was Geoffrey. I remember walking out of my office and seeing this man that looked like Fabio sitting on the couch. Like, he could’ve entered a Fabio look-a-like contest and won. I thought one of my staff members was pulling a prank on me. I walked up with my arm outstretched. “Good morning. I’m Tammy.”
He slowly stood up, towering over me by at least a foot. “Good morning. I’m Geoffrey.”
I smiled and shook his hand. “It’s very nice to meet you. Let’s go into the office here and get this interview started.” I lead him into the office and sat down across from him. I tried to imagine this guy as the perfect employee, but I honestly had no idea. “So…tell me about yourself.”
Geoffrey smiled. “Well. I love cats. Like…love cats. I have 10 of my own and I would love to have my own cat rescue one day. I want to make everyone aware of spaying and neutering your cats because they can have way too many babies and we don’t need anymore cats around. I also trap and release any strays that are in my neighborhood and make sure that if there are any kittens that they are safe. Either by finding them new homes or making sure to they get fixed before they reproduce again.”
“Uh…” I wasn’t really sure what to say. “So…is there anything else I should know about you?”
Geoffrey flipped his hair over his shoulder. “I also love to grow my hair. I haven’t cut it in 5 years and I wash it everyday. I use a special shampoo that helps my hair to stay healthy and helps it grow longer everyday.”
“Awesome? That’s really impressive.” I wasn’t really sure what to think of this guy. Was he serious?
He started looking around and cleared his throat. “Are there any cats here that need homes? I would be willing to take one or two of them home to join my family.”
I shook my head. “No, every cat here has a home. So we aren’t looking for homes for any of them.”
Geoffrey’s face fell a little. “Oh…well can I work with the cats? I just…I love cats so much. I want them to be in my life always. I just…I just…” He started to tear up a little. “I just want to be able to save every cat and give them the best life possible. I want to be a friend with every cat. I just..I need cats in my life all the time.”
“I…I don’t think this is the right job for you then. All of our cats here have loving homes and they are just staying for a couple days or maybe weeks. I think you need to look for something at a shelter or a cat rescue, not here. Unfortunately I don’t think this would work out for you.”
He wiped the tears from his eyes and stood up. “I understand ma’am. Thank you for the opportunity.” Geoffrey walked out of the office and out the lobby doors. I hoped the best for him and I hoped he could find a job. Just…maybe one that didn’t involve cats.
Mackheenyaha
I’ve seen some strange names in my time as a manager, but nothing like this. How was I supposed to pronounce this? When I had to call her in regards to coming in for an interview, I couldn’t even try to pronounce her name. I just said that I was calling to schedule an interview and thankfully she called back. Unfortunately I wasn’t able to catch how to pronounce her name.
As I walked out into the lobby she was sitting on the couch waiting. She was tiny, she seemed like she was maybe 16 at the most. I stepped up toward her. “Good afternoon. I’m Tammy.”
She stood up and held out her hand. “Hello. I’m Mackhennyaha.”
I shook her hand but was still confused on how to pronounce her name. I led her into the office and we both sat down. I didn’t want to go through the whole interview saying her name wrong the entire time. So I had to ask. “I hate to ask this, but how to you pronounce your name?”
She giggled. “I know…it’s crazy. It’s pronounced as if it’s spelled M-C-K-E-N-N-A. My mom was very obsessed with my name being spelled differently than every other Mckenna out there. So, my name was spelled the way it’s spelled.”
“Oh…well…awesome.” I asked a couple of standard questions before asking about what they could bring to the team. “Alright. So what could you bring to the team?”
She took a moment to think. “I would say that I am someone who follows instructions very well. So I would have no issue coming into work and working under a fantastic female leader.”
That took me by surprise. “Only a female leader? I have 2 guys who are leaders in the back so you would need to listen to them as well.”
Mackheenyaha scoffed. “You hire men here? Don’t you think it be better to just have all girls around here? You know what I mean?”
I nodded. “Yes, I know exactly what you mean. But that doesn’t mean that the business should only have women working around here. Sometimes you do need a guy to help with something.”
She leaned back in her chair. “I would’ve thought that the business run by a woman would only have women working. It seems kinda counter intuitive to have men in the business.”
I snickered. “Did you know that our CEO is a man?”
Mackheenyaha’s jaw dropped. “What? I wouldn’t have applied if I knew that this company was run by a MAN. Geez I’m stupid. Thank you. Sorry for wasting your time.” She stood up and quickly made her way through the lobby and out the door. Strange interview. But definitely wasn’t the strangest.
2 Cats and a Laptop 